Why I Wear Makeup?

by 12:46 0 Comments
Guys/Men/Boys;

Why do I wear Makeup? I'm not even trying to impress anyone even with the opposite or the same Gender. Nope.

I started to wear Makeups when I was 21 Years old.
I've been through 12 times of chemotherapies. My blood count was abnormal. My blood pressure was abnormal. I was so weak. I have no hair. I have no eyebrows. I've been so thin. I eat 7 Months of Tuberculosis Medicine and My White Blood count was totally 0% and sometimes it could only achieve to 1-2%.

Whenever I went out, People would greet Me with this kind of sentences:
"Eh. Kurusnya. Makan laa banyak sikit."
"Eh. Pucatnya! Pakai laa Makeup sikit. Jangan nampak sangat Awak tu sakit."
"At least pakai laa bedak. Jangan tunjuk sangat Awak tu sakit."

I received those comments with broad smile. It hurts. Seriously. I didn't get the chance to beautify My face. I didn't realize I've been that ugly and pale. During My chemo session, I lie down on the Hospital's bed and started to watch many Makeup Tutorials on Youtube.

Luckily I have My Mum who understands how it feels to receive those types of comments. She'd been through what I've been through. She brought Me to Avon and bought Me few Makeups (Eyeliner, Lipstick, Foundation Powder, Mascara, Eyebrow Pencil and Blusher).

I've started learning slowly on how to apply those things on My face. I did covered My paleness. And I didn't received those types of comments anymore. I look healthier, and they couldn't even tell that I am a Cancer & Tuberculosis Patient. I'm so glad.

I started to love Makeups as it hides what underneath. Same as I carved smile on My face and People wouldn't know what's beneath My heart.

So, Yea. I wear Makeup to hide My ugliness. 

Deal with it.

Ruqayya Fuad

Essayist

If anyone can have it, I don't want it

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